Dear Friends

DF 13 - The Guestbook - geschlossen (January 2000)

Jan 2000

Dear Friends,

The guest book she is closed. Geschlossen. Maybe she will languish, faded and forgotten, in some distant cyberspace retirement home. Re-reading the notes from her subscribers and whispering the occasional passage to David Bowie…'is this what you meant when you talked about unimaginable excitement David?'

Or maybe she will return one day, in simple faith, strengthened by her retreat. Drawing us back to her bosom, wincing occasionally at our indiscretions and raging intolerance. Snoozing during the interminable ramblings of the hopelessly insufficient, and laughing her knickers off at the wild stream of misunderstanding, humourless arrogance, offence taken where none was intended, and, let's not forget, subsequent rounds of apology, embarrassment, explanation and making up.

What she will not do (and I have this on good authority) is mediate, regulate or censor. My guess is that she'll return in a few weeks, refreshed but ever so slightly de-sensitised by her experience. She indicated to me, before she disappeared, that argument was healthy, and a good scrap never hurt anyone, but she did prefer to keep the tone up. I think she's trying to say, although she is far too polite to put it bluntly, that if we cut out the abuse and the pages and pages of self-serving banter, we might all benefit. She could be right. Who knows?

What's this? A new competition. Ah Ha!

I remember the bus, just the Greyhound and us
It was in between St. Paul and Fargo
There were two days to go but we virgins were slow
And my hand hadn't moved since Chicago

Moving over your knee was new territory
We were passing through Billings, Montana
As we slipped through Spokane, you said something profane
And I shifted up into Nirvana

Lying there like a pearl, oh my Ithaca girl
We've got forty-four days in Tacoma
As we lay in the sand with my life in your hand
I just drifted in Pacificoma

There was nothing to say we just shivered all day
As we touched and I kissed you all over
They said 'go west young man' and it's true that you can
For a whole ninety-nine dollar rover

These are the lyrics to what song? I have left out the chorus (obviously) which contains the title. The prize(s) will range from a pair of tickets for a show anywhere, to some small bits of signed memorabilia. I haven't decided the details yet, it depends on the standard of entry. Last time it was very good, when we had a sort of quiz in reverse. Something different this time I think. The competition will run over the course of a few weeks. More foolish questions very soon, watch this space. Answers please to the e-mail link on this site.

Back in a few days. Have a great century.

Peace & love,
Ian Gillan
Copyright © Ian Gillan 2000

....... and just as this came to an end it has been decided (by those whose job it is to decide 'it's) that the very comely Guestbook should reappear on licence. It is, or very shortly will be (depending on your point of view), a new century and a spot of parole was deemed appropriate.

The Guestbook will stay for the duration of the competition - which will run for a few weeks - and may (p'raps) stay a tad longer. Tads are hard to find and are easily wasted.

Happy 2000 (neutral stance here, please note).

serial no: 432761A3X
Steve Campbell
Return to:
return to DF index